Re: Women

Posted by Mark - IN. on September 08, 2005 at 20:41:45 from (205.188.117.6):

In Reply to: Women posted by Walker Dogs on September 07, 2005 at 21:22:58:

Get yourself a subscription to Cosmopolitan Magazine. No joke. I have this theory. You start reading Cosmo, and get the low down on what they're thinking before they tell you what they're thinking. You'll head things off at the pass by beating them to the punch.

Still with me? So, they'll start telling their girlfriends and stuff how thoughtful and sensitive you are, unaware that you're just reading their intercepted playbook and using it to your advantage, their disadvantage. Then once they're comfortably right where you want them, you become a guy again and cut them off at the friggin knees.

One last thing about Cosmo, if you read it backwards, like playing some songs backwards on the record player, satanic messages. LOL.

And two last bits of advice. Guys are stupid - every woman alive knows it and has told us that so many times, we'll never be able to count them. Right? Heard it a million times? Well, next time you do something stupid (supposedly), as you'll surely hear, you simply remind them of how stupid we are, and they know it because they've told us a gazillion times, to which they'll agree, and then you go right back to what you were doing before they yelled at you, as they walk away. Can use that one a couple of times before get clobbered with a skillet.

The last bit of advice, the "nuclear option" when they start getting real upity... ask them "In history, how many women Presidents of these United States of America have there been? Huh? Huh? Huh?". Oh, that one will get you sleeping on the couch, in the garage, or the barn, but sometimes it's just what you have to do.

Mark

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