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Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story

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Larry59

02-12-2008 03:08:50




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It's about 5 am and I am having my coffee. Well got up at 4 and could not sleep so here I set. News stinks as usual and I am tired of hearing about the elections already! Wife is still down in Arkansas at her dad's place and for now helping to take of her step mother who had a stroke a few years back. So she is kind of messed up in her mind from that. This causing more stress for the situation. That being her dad is still in hospital that say's he won't be coming home again. Heart failure and other major problems are his problems. He comes and goes out of responce at times for days. Then don't make a lot of sense when he is awake. Can't feed himself even and eats very little as I seen. But things are a lot worst even then just that there. Seems he his close to broke with only his monthly income coming in. Which is about 3000.00 a month. Not bad one might think! But his preacher we found has been getting $800.00 a month in tidings!!!! That's not 10 percent in my book! This preachers wife had to gal to call the house and ask for his check of this while he is in the hospital dieing. {sounds bed right?} Got worst as I see it. He went to hospital and ask Sharons dad to sign over to church his Magna Hemi wagon that is a couple years old and only 20,000 miles on it. Sharon found spending records that show he and his wife took preacher and his entire family out to dinner several times a month and the bill always run around 85.00 each time! Sounds to me like the preacher is a bit of a shister and takes advantage of older folks. For Sharon's dad is 84 years old and in wheel chair most the time. Now one wonders what the heck was this man doing with a Hemi wagon! Well he said all his life he never owned a new car. But this time he did and he wanted one that when he told wife to step on the gas and go they would! ...Well guess if that makes one happy you do it. But he paid cash for it and it seems it was like 30,000.00 plus he paid at time. Wife don't know if their any good but she just found some small insurance policy and was glad to find that cause there was no money to bury him when it happens. At least that is some relief. Now one question one might ask their self. If she is all that messed up. How did she drive him around in that Hemi Wagon! ... Don't ask me cause I seen her driving with him and I don't have an answer. Other then he said before he just tells her what to do..... ..Good Grif!!!!! !! I told my wife to never let me go with her nor her go with her are even get infront of them. lol Anyway Sharon dad's heart beat keeps dropping to they say 50 count. But then at some point it starts beating about 80 and keeping him alive. Couple days ago. Sharon called me at home and told me he took a term for the worst. So I told her I will wait for a call and head out south to Arkansas to be there with her. ...Well he woke up day before again and heart started pumping a bit more. But not enough to pull him out of danger. So here I set with phone and porta phone just waiting and waiting. One of Harrits sister.. oh that is her step moms name. Wants us to pack up and just move down and take care of her step mom till she dies. But there is no way I can just sell everything I have and move there. When the house is morgage to the max with many years of paying for it. Plus there is no insurrance to pay that load off when her dad does die. It's a mess... well anyway this explains my good friend "OLD" or Rich. Said on my maybe having to leave. Cause I thought I was going anytime that night. "Still waiting for that call"

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TylerARK

02-13-2008 08:03:27




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Larry, Hate to hear about this But what town is the preacher from. If not too far, I could make a personal visit and see if I can help him see the light, or stars whichever he needs ! I have heard of some other preachers doing this also and they all eventually ended up getting on down the road, two actually ended up in jail. One that wasnt too far from here was running a firewood fundraiser. He talked some young folks into cutting wood for him, then they hauled it to town and sold it. The bad part was he didnt tell anyone that owned the woods that he was cutting firewood and none of the money made it to the church accounts so he was arrested but fled before the trial. Probably doing it somewhere else now. A little persuasion can go a long way !!!
Tyler from ARK

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Nancy Howell

02-12-2008 19:47:10




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
I am so very glad that things are better. Regardless of who the will benefits, secure it so the wishes of your father-in-law are carried out. The items my hubby pointed out are things we've learned the hard way and will make things easier for your family when the time comes. As he said, the family my father-in-law wound up with when he remarried, turned out to be liars, thieves, felons on parole. When her family pulled up to our home for the funeral, my hubby went to greet them. The felon on parole didn't bother with the normal pleasantries such as how are you, etc. The first words out of his mouth were "Are you going to probate the will?"

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Larry59

02-12-2008 18:36:59




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 More of what is going on ! in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
I apperiate all your comments. Was very kind of you folks and all was read. My wife called me about hour ago. Said she had talked to the step mothers sister. She will be taking control soon of everything and she lives only a few miles from her. *S
Her dad they say has .. some body needed functions that are not now working. So he can never come home no matter what. That they the hospital can keep him only so long. Then he must go into a nursing home of which he don't want to go there. Wife says call to her from preacher the other day asking how long she will be there. Has not gone up to see her dad in the hospital now. So he must know we are on to his games and backing off.
This I take as good news out of this mess. My wife says.. she plans on coming home in about 2 weeks are less. Since the sister is taking over and her dad is put in nursing home. As for a "Will". We found one and it leaves stuff to grand kids and we really don't care anyway. Not there for that and don't need any thing from him anyway.
There is one sad part to this.. tomorrow is Valintines Day.. my wife and I anniversary of 19 years for us. We have 6 kids between us. My 3 and her 3 but they are really our kids. We love them all. Wife and I will celebrate sometime after she comes home and gets to unwind from all this mess.
Again I think you. For I know this is a tractor form.. but no one around in my house but me to talk to. So like a vent I can here. Did help. Thanks

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James Howell

02-12-2008 11:27:48




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
The hardest part of my suggestion will be to deal with this as a Business/Financial problem and not a Personal problem.

Keep in mind that a person can do whatever they please with their personal assets/property as long as they are alive.

The legal status and ownership of assets/property changes once the owner passes.

You need to find the father-in-law's original will.

Get father-in-law to revoke all written codicils except for his original will while his is able.

This can be on any type of paper in his handwriting and his current signature.

Have this filed and notarized at the courthouse of his residence.

Get father-in-law to change beneficiary on life insurance policies.

This can be written instructions in his handwriting and original signature. Have the life insurance beneficiary as his ESTATE.

This keeps all the extremely distant relatives and Rev. Leroy from filing claims against you or the executor. Explain to them that the dispersal of these assets will be determined by the probate court according to the original will.

When the time comes, probate the will. This is the only LEGAL way to settle a person's estate.

Find original title to vehicle. Have your father-in-law sign the original title and title transfer documents to you.

"Relocate" vehicle to another location.

Rev. Leroy will eventually need to prove in probate court a valid claim against father-in-laws estate to "legally" get title and possession of the vehicle.

Get a Bill of Sale from your father-in-law for any of his personal property that Rev. Leroy,his wife, and the "church" may have expressed an interest.

Go to an attorney and prepare a durable power of attorney. Do not start "moving" money around unless you have the right or authority to do so.

Have father-in-law sign and date a check and leave amount blank. The check can be deposited or cashed as necessary.

Go to an attorney and start process for guardianship.

Go to attorney and prepare Notice to Physicians and Doctors for your father-in-law.

Go to District Attorney and discuss course of action on Rev. Leroy. Advise Rev. Leroy that you have spoken to District Attorney.

Go to hospital management and demand restrictions on Rev. Leroy access to father-in-law. Advise Rev. Leroy that you have spoken to hospital management.

I truly hope that all works out for you and your family. From my personal experience things get worse before they get better.

My dad passed away last March at age 87. The hardest decision I have ever made in my life was to let him pass.

If my suggestions above seem harsh and callous, it it from dealing with the greed of liars, thieves, convicted felons, and ex-convicts on parole that are member of the family my father re-married into.

Lord Help Us All.

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Nancy Howell

02-12-2008 10:54:33




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Larry, all of us stand with you and give you support. I am a firm believer in our Lord and people who use His name for their betterment make me very angry. God will take care of him. My beloved hubby and I are going through a difficult time settling his Dad's estate. I cannot urge you strongly enough to get a power of attorney immediately and move all funds to a different account that you and/or you wife have control over and no one else. Secure all deeds and vehicle titles, locate and secure the will (if any). Many more things I could suggest that we have learned the hard way in dealing with my father-in-law's estate, but those are most important. I do not think it would be wise for you to sell your home at this time. I also agree with the others about contacting the hierarchy of the church and discussing this individual's (refuse to call him pastor/preacher) behavior. So very sorry for your difficulties. God be with you.

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ArleninOr

02-12-2008 10:40:34




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Larry, we are praying for you and yours and hoping everything works out ok. There has been some good advice given so will not say anything on the preacher subject. Why not move MIL in with you or real close to you ? We did that and it was the best thing for all of us.Got to know things about family that I would never have learned otherwise. My nickels worth GOOD LUCK



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730virgil

02-12-2008 09:59:03




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
check and see if this crook has somehow got f-i-l estate left to him. sounds like a real sob to me.



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730virgil

02-12-2008 09:56:41




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
get in contact with this preachers conference and talk to bishop let him in on what preacher has been doing. i bet he is doing same thing with others in church. this guy belongs in jail with the worst kind of crooks. this isn't the way god's people work.



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johnand cindy

02-12-2008 09:07:16




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Larry, Call a local atty. ASAP get power of atty. on the finances and family decisions. It is a difficult time for you and your wife and you dont need outsiders meddling in your family affairs. We will pray that GOD will protect your family from these vultures. John



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Steve in MN

02-12-2008 08:45:05




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Man I feel for you and your wife. Tough situation to be in. Unfortunately no easy way out. Keep an eye on that preacher. Maybe I'm a little naive but never heard of anything that blatant before. Anyway, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your wife. Keep the faith.



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fixerupper

02-12-2008 08:12:03




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
So sorry to hear of your mess. You are in my prayers.

There are a bunch of good helpful people like you,who are in it only to help the other person through a problem. It's too bad we have to be constantly looking over our shoulders for the circling vultures.

The full time clergyman's job is to help people with the problems they have in their minds and spirits ONLY. If financial planning is needed a non-biased professional can then come in to assist. I'd better shut up before I hurt myself pounding on the desk. Jim

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moonlite 37

02-12-2008 06:34:01




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
I hope that this incident does not discourage anyone from from finding the real God and his Church. Legal assistance is in order.



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glennster

02-12-2008 05:47:42




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
so very sorry to hear to hear about your family. we will keep you in our thoughts and prayers. if i may give you some advice, have your wife contact an attorney, she needs to have power of attorney and guardianship for her parents, and have this done as soon as possible. the "preacher" will put them in a bad way real fast. i have been through thios when i lost both my parents. maybe john t can chime in and give you some advice.

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super99

02-12-2008 05:26:31




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Sorry to hear about your situation, will add your family to my prayers. Check with States Attorney, some states have laws against preying on the elderly, Worth a shot. Chris



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John S-B

02-12-2008 05:24:22




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Prayers for your family, Larry. I would have someoen contact police to find out about elder abuse laws, which this church seems to be pretty close to. If a church doesn't have open financial records, IT IS NOT A BIBLICAL CHURCH! I think alot of atheists are more honest that some of these "Health and Weath" posers.



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old timer in Ohio

02-12-2008 05:12:52




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Hey there Larry;
I'm just an outsider,but you and yours will be in my prayers. Bob
God Bless

P.S.
I believe the Good Lord has a "special place",for those who "play" the religious game.



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Joe in MN.

02-12-2008 06:24:29




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to old timer in Ohio, 02-12-2008 05:12:52  
Hi Old Timer in Ohio --- what you said about them that play the Religion Game --- you sure it the nail on the Head ---- I see it all the time and it's just a game for those who sell God and make money from fools who don't know how to study and follow the Word of God -- the Bible.



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dave2

02-12-2008 04:44:19




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 Re: To Randy in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Wish you all the very best. As far as the skypilot goes, I'm sure there's a verse somewhere in the Bible to justify whipping his a$$.

Good luck,

Dave



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ericlb

02-12-2008 04:27:07




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
i feel for your family, i had a similar experience when we lost my day 6 years ago, he went quick do to a "dr?"s bumbling, but at least he had things pretty well in hand money wise, when mom got to trying to deal with everything [ shes pushing 80] for the first time ever things got out of control fast, somebody talked her into investing in the stock market in which she lost a substancial sum, but what really galled me was 3 different preachers that had talked her into tithing to their chuches, mom has always been deeply religous which is fine,untill they go so overboard in the whole thing that they can no longer see the overall picture, mom is in that group, and they were gettin almost a grand a month between the 3 of them and she was not even a member of their churches, i should mention also that 2 of those churches were "wildcat" churches, [one of's, not a franchised church like baptists, methodists ect] i always enjoy a good preacher, but it seems to be more and more that con men have found the religon business to be a great way to get money and hide out and prey on especially the elderly, the ones who need them most, they seem to always be for forgiven when they get caught being less that they should be too, i better stop this befor i use more space

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Randy S

02-12-2008 03:54:24




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Larry i feel for you and your family deeply. Dad died of cancer in 98 and i can understand some of your feelings. As for the preacher, you need to have a face to face or face to baseball bat meeting. Preachers playing these con games on anyone much less the older generation really gets me fired up. To me they are more like a used car salesman, and thats another story.

Before i get started ranting myself i just want to wish you all the best in your times of trouble.

God will be there for you , just ask.

Randy S

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Larry59

02-12-2008 04:00:45




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 To Randy in reply to Randy S, 02-12-2008 03:54:24  
I understand how you feel. But proving it is another thing. Common since says it's so and how he goes about things. In court we would not have a chance against him. All he has to say is.. was given not taken!



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Michael Soldan

02-12-2008 04:47:42




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 Re: To Randy in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 04:00:45  
Larry, I'm sorry to hear of your in law's health problems, a trying time. In regards to the preacher, I have come to the conclusion that many of them can be the greediest and crookedest of all mankind, those that prey on the elderly not pray with them. You can do something about this. Every church I have been a member of has kept records of donations and what you contribute for the year..if your Father in Law's cancelled checks and the church records don't add up then you have proof..this guy could be nailed for income tax evasion as well if he has not claimed these gifts ..but you can nail his unholy azz either way. Tally up what you think your FIL has given over the last five years, assemble the check stubs and call IRS...your preacher will be taken care of I can assure you!

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WalJohn

02-12-2008 03:50:00




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
I would try to find somewhere farther up in the church, if possible, to report him to. My Aunt's Methodist church had some concerns about their minister and managed to get him replaced. I would also let him know in no uncertain means that what he did was unethical and against evrything the church teaches.



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Larry59

02-12-2008 03:57:55




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 Just not sure. if he gave on his own. in reply to WalJohn, 02-12-2008 03:50:00  
Oh he knows.. wife told him they were broke and could not give like that no more. So he asked her just how long will she be staying there? She told him was no certain but for sometime. lol Like to seen his face when she told him that! She is not letting step mom take the check book with her to hospital where he shows up at times. Only some cash on her. lol That made me laugh. Two can play his game for now. Just not sure what will happen when she comes home. Might not be able to talk her into asist living. Mother inlaw says she don't like them places already.

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Irv (Ia)

02-12-2008 03:31:18




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:08:50  
Been browsing on here for a little while and reading your posts about your family, and just wanted to sympathize with you.
We're going through the mother-in-law stroke thing, also. Not nearly as bad as your situation, for sure, but can sure relate to that. My poor wife gets down in the dumps sometimes, so I can't inmagine what its like for you and yours to have both of them to look after. Take care.
Irv(Ia)*

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Larry59

02-12-2008 03:38:32




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Irv (Ia), 02-12-2008 03:31:18  
Yes.. were put on a spot on this one. I am not moving there to take care of someone who could live another 20 years in her house. No place to put my stuff but in storage to. um ummmm no way. Can't file no charges on preacher cause it was done free will on the giving. Just don't no how that minister talked them into that much money. Wife says.. maybe dad was trying to buy his way in to the after life. *S that did make me smile knowing him as I do. lol Got to laugh sometimes. For there just is no good news from that way.... and tired of wife being gone. I can't cook worth a ..well you know what! Can't sleep much. Been with my wife now for many years and on Valintines day is our anveresary (spelling not sure on that word" and she will be down south about in another state. shessss Anyway just blowing off some steam. Needed it!

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Irv (Ia)

02-12-2008 07:28:55




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:38:32  
Seems like a feller has to find a little humor in the worst of situations. My old neighbor who's been gone a long time, told me about being in the thick of it in WW2, not having a bath for a month or two, and they were sitting during a lull in the fighting, comparing the different lice they had and chuckling about it!! "I got a little red one, you got one of them??". Never will forget that! LOL



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Bendee

02-12-2008 04:20:49




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 Re: Larry still here and not in Arkansas. the story in reply to Larry59, 02-12-2008 03:38:32  
Sorry to but in on your grief but it might be pertinent to check the will.



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