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Tractor Talk Discussion Forum

Joke: Forrest Gump

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randallinMo

01-31-2008 10:03:39




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Forrest Gump dies and goes to heaven. He's met at the pearly gate by St. Peter and St. Peter says,"Hi Forrest, good to see you. We've got three entrance exam questions for you that you need to answer correctly before I can let you in". Forrest says, "Well, OK, I just hope they aren't too hard". St. Peter says, "First, what two days of the week start out with the letter T", next, how many seconds are there in a year, and lastly, what was God's first name"? "You can think about these questions until tomorrow and come back and give me the answers."
The next day Forrest shows up on time and St. Peter asks him if he has the answers. Forrest says,"Well the answser to the first question was pretty hard, but I'm pretty sure the two days of the week that begin with "T" are Today and Tomorrow. St. Peter says "Well that wasn't exactly what I had in mind, but I guess I didn't clarify the question enough, so I'll give you credit for that one". Forrest says,"Now the answer to the second question was REALLY hard, but I'm almost certain that there are 12 seconds in a year". St. Peters eyes open wide, and he says,"Forrest, how in the world could you possibly come up with that answer"? "I'm totally astonished with that answer"! Forrest says,'Well St. Peter, the way I see it, there's January second, February second, March second..... ..... ..St. Peter is in total amazement, but acknowledges that his answers aren't "wrong" so says,"Well what was God's first name"? Forrest says, 'Oh, that was the easy one, "It had to be "Andy". St. Peter says, "ANDY"??!! What in the world are you thinking? Forrest says, "Well in the Bible it says, "Andy" walked with me..... ....."Andy Talked with me..... ....."Andy calls me by my name".
St. Peter shakes his head, opens the gates and says,"RUN FORREST RUN'!

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noncompos

01-31-2008 12:54:24




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to randallinMo, 01-31-2008 10:03:39  
Hey, neat: these days, we need all the laughs we can get...



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David Snipes

01-31-2008 11:45:34




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to randallinMo, 01-31-2008 10:03:39  
At least the chickens were farmy. This is not. I don't think Gump worked on a farm.



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John S-B

01-31-2008 13:33:34




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to David Snipes, 01-31-2008 11:45:34  
He did live on a old plantation. Don"t get yer tighty whitey"s all in a bunch.



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David Snipes

02-01-2008 11:27:09




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to John S-B, 01-31-2008 13:33:34  
You're right! I stand corrected and withdraw my snide comment.



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Dave H (MI)

01-31-2008 14:27:27




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to John S-B, 01-31-2008 13:33:34  
Yup...and got around on a tractor...er...riding mower.



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cj in wisconsin

01-31-2008 10:28:04




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to randallinMo, 01-31-2008 10:03:39  
Careful, Tom43 may take offense to a joke on a tractor forum, he sure had a fit the other day when someone wrote in a joke about a chicken. Personally I like it, harmless, clean and funny, dont get that everyday. Thanks..... Big grin!!!



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LEH

01-31-2008 10:23:19




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to randallinMo, 01-31-2008 10:03:39  
That's a GOOD one!!



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coloken

01-31-2008 10:23:12




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to randallinMo, 01-31-2008 10:03:39  
Now that one was worth reading. Big grin. Kenny



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Dave H (MI)

01-31-2008 14:26:32




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 Re: Joke: Forrest Gump in reply to coloken, 01-31-2008 10:23:12  
Hey! You're a different guy after youse had your coffee. Sorry for pickin at you down there!



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Andy Motteberg

01-31-2008 10:22:56




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 I don't get it in reply to randallinMo, 01-31-2008 10:03:39  
??



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Nebraska Cowman

01-31-2008 11:40:51




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 Re: I don't get it in reply to Andy Motteberg, 01-31-2008 10:22:56  
It's an old favorite Hymn Andy


In The Garden I come to the garden alone
While the dew is still on the roses
And the voice I hear falling on my ear
The Son of God discloses

And He walks with me
And He talks with me
And He tells me I am His own
And the joy we share
As we tarry there
None other has ever known He speaks and the sound of His voice
Is so sweet the birds hush their singing
And the melody that He gave to me
Within my heart is ringing

And He walks with me
And He talks with me
And He tells me I am His own
And the joy we share
As we tarry there
None other has ever known "Cause me to hear
thy lovingkindness in the morning;
for in thee do I trust: cause me to
know the way wherein I should walk;
for I lift up my soul unto thee."
Psalms 143:8


"The Spirit itself beareth witness
with our spirit, that we are
the children of God."
Romans 8:16

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jnj

01-31-2008 10:39:37




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 Re: I don't get it in reply to Andy Motteberg, 01-31-2008 10:22:56  
It's not even a tractor joke but it was worth the time, i needed a good chuckle.



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cj in wisconsin

01-31-2008 10:39:27




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 Re: I don't get it in reply to Andy Motteberg, 01-31-2008 10:22:56  
Substitute the words Andy with the words "and he" you will soon get it, since you and God have the same name I thought you would get it, just kiddin man dont get mad at me.



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big red 1

01-31-2008 10:38:16




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 Re: I don't get it in reply to Andy Motteberg, 01-31-2008 10:22:56  
Read your bible



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Andy Motteberg

01-31-2008 12:02:51




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 Re: I don't get it in reply to big red 1, 01-31-2008 10:38:16  
I do read my Bible, this was not anything from the bible, it was a "joke".



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big red 1

01-31-2008 12:19:03




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 Re: I don't get it in reply to Andy Motteberg, 01-31-2008 12:02:51  
Just kidding-It took me sometime to figure it out.



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