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Tractor Talk Discussion Forum

Humor - seein' is believin'

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ShepFL

02-23-2005 07:49:41




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A lady goes to Wal-Mart to purchase a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.

A Wal-Mart associate is standing there
wearing dark shades. She says, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"

He says, "Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes."

She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.

He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod, medium action, with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-LB. Test line. It's a good all around combination; and it's on sale this week for only
$20.00."

She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor. "Oh, that sounds like a Visa card," he says.

She bends down to pick it up and accidentally breaks wind. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who farted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.

The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please."

The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me it was on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?"

He replies, "Yes, Ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck Call is $11.00 and the Catfish Bait is $3.50."

Grins :>)

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Can't-Resist

02-23-2005 10:07:24




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 Re: Humor - seein' is believin' in reply to ShepFL, 02-23-2005 07:49:41  
Two old guys are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide.

The first old guy says to the second guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."

The second old guy says, "That's OK. It's a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too. I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate." The first old guy says, "Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like?" The second old guy says, "Well, she is 27 years old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs, big bust, and is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like?" To which the first old guy says, "Doesn't matter-- let's look for yours."

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George in Biloxi

02-23-2005 08:33:17




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 Re: Humor - seein' is believin' in reply to ShepFL, 02-23-2005 07:49:41  
That's a good one.

THREE WOMEN -- ONE GERMAN, ONE JAPANESE AND A HILLBILLY, WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA.

SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE GERMAN PRESSED
HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED.

THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. "THAT WAS MY PAGER," SHE
SAID." I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM.

A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG. THE JAPANESE WOMAN
LIFTED HER PALM TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, "THAT
WAS MY MOBILE PHONE. I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND."

THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FELT DECIDEDLY LOW TECH. NOT TO BE
OUTDONE, SHE DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING JUST AS IMPRESSIVE. SHE STEPPED OUT OF THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET PAPER HANGING FROM HER BEHIND.

THE OTHERS RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND STARED AT HER.

THE HILLBILLY WOMAN FINALLY SAID, "WELL, WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT. I'M GETTING A FAX.

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mud

02-23-2005 08:11:12




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 Re: Humor - seein' is believin' in reply to ShepFL, 02-23-2005 07:49:41  
That gets sent on! Thanks Shep



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Les...fortunate

02-23-2005 08:09:31




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 ROFLMAO! in reply to ShepFL, 02-23-2005 07:49:41  
Hey Shep, I'm heading your way this afternoon. Just checked the Southwest website and my flight should be leaving and arriving on time. Gonna be at the Flywheelers tomorrow.



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ShepFL

02-23-2005 09:03:58




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 Re: ROFLMAO! in reply to Les...fortunate, 02-23-2005 08:09:31  
I am trying to sneak outta here. Had a major computer crash last week and still not fully recovered. Affected customers world wide including me and my tractor time.



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