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Re: OT/Dealing with family members


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Posted by trucker40 on January 31, 2010 at 08:52:16 from (69.151.61.30):

In Reply to: OT/Dealing with family members posted by 135 Fan on January 30, 2010 at 21:39:13:

One thing Ive noticed when somebody tells a story like this is everything they are saying can be also turned around on them.Like you probably dont listen to your Mom.It sounds like you turn a conversation into an argument.I have had arguments with older relatives before,but didnt hang up on them.I just let them win by saying something like I never thought about it like that,or I see what you are saying,and let it go.Winning an argument is not important if you want to get along with them.If an older person tells you something,even if you dont like it,you should listen to it first,then either you go along with it,or say I dont agree and talk about something else.Try and find something they like to talk about.If you try and talk about that religious stuff it will not work to try and change her mind on it.She also doesnt care about your problems now.If you try and drag that stuff in there all you are going to get from it is trouble.
I bet if we heard a story from your Mom about this it would be completely different from her view.Im a mechanic not a psychiatrist so follow any of this advise at your own risk.I agree that most of the problem sounds like it is you more than her.Dont gang up on her with your girlfriend either.You have to look at it from her perspective,not yours.Once you do that it might be different in your mind and you can see where you are messing up.Lots of people get big and tough on the phone they think.Hanging up makes you a snob with an attitude problem or too stupid to talk sensibly.


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