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Re: Need help and/or advice please---kinda long


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Posted by NE IA on November 26, 2009 at 09:26:42 from (206.72.18.153):

In Reply to: Need help and/or advice please---kinda long posted by NCWayne on November 26, 2009 at 03:44:53:

I have to big a mouth to just shut up here, but can sure give you some sound advise as what not to do.

Think about this guy! You did not post anything aggressive towards me--that is a positive. Others have been perhaps more sensative than me and you attact them. You are human for crying out loud, but if you act that way in court, or near a therapist you are doing your case a disfavor. You have to have the attitude of being a victum needing the courts help. Your goal is not one of hate....that gets you nowhere real fast.

It makes no differance what the heck I say or anyone else including the father---YOU have to turn the other cheek and smile. The judge is watching your behavior in that court room--he knows what your attatude is by your physical language as well as what you say.

KEEP cool and play the inocent victum here for crying out loud--your goal is not to see the dad in jail---your ONLY concern is what is best for the little one. Any frakin attorney should have told you this in the begining.

Putting dad in jail so the daughter can tell all the kids at school daddys in jail? For heavens sake let the judge pass that judgment--not you wanting that order. Just ask the judge plesantly for some help, because you are having a struggle with the dollars--that is all you need to say, the rest you are shooting yourself in the foot.

Keep a very accurate diary of the events with date and time and witnesses---but then point out the dads positive points that you are THANKFULL FOR--for the child.

A attorney that comes to court demanding, making a drama queen out of himself is hurting your case as well---keep it civial and to the point--no emotions other than you feel sorry for the little one. The judge will put a gold star on your report, and favor your rational decisions or wishes. BUT you should refer to them as solutions to a problem, not your wishes. Judges aren't all that stupid, even though they are ex-attorneys--he is watching you at all times.

Is it important in your state that you must file contempt charges, or does the state do that on it's own? Some states take away drivers licence for not paying child support. Does that make sence? A dead beat dad having no money, now has no way to get to work. How much money can he make in jail? This is not what I think, but what do you realy think the judge is thinking?

Keep track of expences involved to the cent to present your case--no BSing, as if you bend the numbers, or get nit pickey, it hurts your case.

In your disfavor rides the fact that the judge reads the papers, and notices a lack of employment. That is a tough one to take. I'm unsure how that will shake out.

Lets be fair here and put yourself in the judges place--you need money? This judge makes lots of money compared to you and the dad. So how do you respond to the folks in the slums not having any money? We have it better than them, so we feel they are lazy--bla bla bla. Any idea what the judge is thinking? Why don't you folks work harder like me the judge and make more money?


Keep it cool in the court room, and you have a much better chance. Now get the heck off this computer and go play with the little one and give her a extra hug, let her know she is special, and all will be ok.


By the way, this applies to you as well, all will be ok in the end--it just takes along time to get there.

Good Luck, and sorry for being so blunt.

Plesse print this all off and read it twenty years from now--it will make better sence then.


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