time to lighten up

pete black · Feb 26, 2009

after reading venting i thought that i might vent some also. i am nearing 62 yrs. of age and started recalling old sayings that my dad might have used. here are a few, what are some of yours?
1."much obliged" for thinking someone.
2. "i'm beholden to you" when someone helped him.
3. "get shed of" when he wanted to get rid of something.
4. "well i called myself a looking" when he had overlooked something.

Gary from Muleshoe · Feb 26, 2009

How about: "Dryer than a popcorn fart." When we hadn"t had rain in months.

That how the Texas Panhandle is right now.

ScottyHOMeY · Feb 26, 2009

My great-gandfather used to make a distinction between recollect and remember. Anything that had happened in the past, he'd start with, "Well, I recollect . . ." Only time he used remember was looking forward, as in, "Now you just remember what I told you."

Old Roy · Feb 26, 2009

My Dad always liked to barter or trade for things.
When he thought he was getting the raw end of the deal he would say something like ,

Your trying to make my feel bad hurt" So the other guy may come up with some boot. But sometimes ended up with a "Pig in a Poke"

My sister would go home and tell Mom sometimes and

"Let the cat out of the Bag"

Anonymous-0 · Feb 26, 2009

Dad;s uncle told that to the scale man when we brought in a load of wheat. He could never understand how come they had to check more than one time out of the same field. LOL.
My great grandfather used to say; "no work, no eat," i can still hear his voice in broken english.

pete black · Feb 26, 2009

my dad-in-law will say he got a pain across his "gitworser" meaning he has to go to the bathroom before it got any worse. still laughing over the popcorn fart.

IA Roy · Feb 26, 2009

Tighter than a bull's butt in fly season!-Frugal

Stiffer than a 3 pecker billy goat-Rigid

Sharper than a bowling ball

Paul in MN · Feb 26, 2009

My Grandmother's saying when she was serving up dinner or lunch: "Well you can't fatten pigs on clear water". I never did fully understand what she was referring to. And she was a professional chef in a large hotel. She was not our favorite Grandmother!! And she never cooked anything good for us kids.

James Howell · Feb 26, 2009

[b:654c4848f0]Some of my dad's sayings:[/b:654c4848f0]

Don't know sheep sh!t from cotton seed.

Hotter than a depot stove.

Hotter than a four-ba11ed tom cat.

Uglier than a mud fence.

Dumber than a fence post.

Would argue with a stop sign.

Don't worry about the mules, just load the wagon.

Long in the tooth.

Prettier than a nine teeted bird dog.

And finally my favorite - [b:654c4848f0]"I'm smart enough not to get mad and you're not smart enough to make me mad".[/b:654c4848f0]

Anonymous-0 · Feb 26, 2009

"She's cuter than a speckled pup under a Studebaker wagon"
"now if that ain't the cat's whiskers"
When something impressed you.
It's colder than a witches umm shovel.yea thats it.

Shetland Sheepdog · Feb 26, 2009

"Busier than a one armed paper hanger in fly time"
"Colder than a well digger's butt in the Yukon"
"Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rockin' chairs"
"Number than a pounded thumb"

Dave 8)

old popper · Feb 26, 2009

Flighty as a fart in a whirlwind.

old popper · Feb 26, 2009

Flighty as a fart in a whirlwind.

Anonymous-0 · Feb 26, 2009

1) No pot so crooked there wasn't a lid to fit it.
2) The pot calling the kettle black.
3) Busier than a one armed paper hanger w/ krabs.
4) (I am) better than most, not as good as others.
5) (I am) putting one foot in front of the other.
6) Squeeze a nickel so tight the Indian had tears in his eyes.
7) Slicker than snot on a door knob.
8) Faster than corn down a new tin funnel.

Mark · Feb 26, 2009

"He"d aggravate the hell out of a wooden Indian." (You gotta be old enough to remember what that is/was).

"You know what that white stuff is on chicken $hit, boy? That"s chicken $hit too."

He doesn"t know his a$$ from a hole in the ground.

Anonymous-0 · Feb 26, 2009

Put a rubber band around your head and snap out of it. Dave

Nancy Howell · Feb 26, 2009

dumber than a box of rocks

a month of Sundays

Older than the hills

tough as wang leather (my dad's saying)

Ain't that just the cat's meow.

Slick as a whistle

got as much chance as a snowball in h...

Got these from James - softer than a baby's butt, as useless as t..s on a boar hog, I've seen a wall-eyed slobbering mule behave better,

knee-high to a grasshopper

sharp as a tack

Anonymous-0 · Feb 26, 2009

If something nearly fits...Neither my a@@ nor my elbow.
Thirsty...drier than a wooden god.

Picking fly dirt out of pepper.

Something won't happen ...As long as my B## points to the ground.

joe-etx · Feb 26, 2009

grew up in pittsburgh pa. and dad said (nothing more useless than a teanage boy).35 years running cow calf operation in tx.

pete black · Feb 26, 2009

my dad-in-law on occasion when eating something that he liked would say it has a "morish" taste, meaning it made you want more of it. and long before barney on mayberry, my dad would tell me "its katie barred the door".

Jeff B. · Feb 26, 2009

Working in the garage with my dad, when something was getting difficult he would say "This is where the cheese gets binding."

When something was expensive he would say "Just like the monkey said when he peed in the cash register... That stuff runs into money."

Kelly C · Feb 26, 2009

Gramps always said.
" He does not know $hit from shinola. What ever shinola is?
Or if he was trying to cut some thing with his pocket knife.
" This knife is so dull it wont cut a hot cow pie"
And for some reason he always refered to me as the Dingle Fause... What ever that was.

Anonymous-0 · Feb 26, 2009

If something was really black, it was "Blacker than a stack of black cats"

If an events or story didn't seem right- " There's someone in the wood pile" (I have changed the racist part)

If all the woodchucks were dead except for the two that I have, I would kill them.
(he fought woodchuck for doing so much damage.

The the depression really affected his life and thinking.-- "Someday its going to happen again, I may not live to see it, but its coming.
"We all can't be chiefs and no indians." -- meaning workers have it too good now days.

greygoat · Feb 27, 2009

My Grandfather called any Tomcat
a "Ball Bearing Mousetrap"

Chris in SK · Feb 27, 2009

My Grandad would say about a dull knife….”you could ride bare ar$e to London on that”….he’s English, somewhere between 95 – 98 years old. Can’t find his birth certificate, and can't remember what year he was born!

Another one about someone careful with their money…“tighter than a duck’s ar$e under water”

Chris

Bob Kerr · Feb 27, 2009

"Shineola" was a brand of shoe polish from way way back. I didn't know either till I found a Shineola shoe shine kit in an antique store. Here is some Dad and other folks I knew used to say. "Tighter than Dicks hat band", "You can't get blood from a turnip', "He could squeeze blood from a turnip", "If you buy that kind of car, better get some good walking shoes","Burnin daylight", "Long walk off a short pier", "You can't polish a turd", "Use your head for more than a hat rack", "Don't come cryin to me", "Faster than a striped ape", "ornery as a mule", "Chicken with its head cut off", "Slicker that a cats a$$", "Lazier than a hound dog with no legs","You get what you pay for", "Be careful what you wish for", "Hotter than Hadies", "Cold enough to freeze a brass monkey", "Wore plum out", "Plum tuckered out", "Out like a light". "Older than Methusala", "Older than dirt", "They did that when Moses played in the dirt". "You reap what you sow". "The squeaky wheel gets the grease". "Dumber than a box of rocks".

bruster · Feb 27, 2009

My one uncle is a little blunt (as a 2 X 4)when giving his opinion, and dad will tell everyone that he means well, but he's "rough as a cob"

skycarp · Feb 27, 2009

"Was anyone hurt in that wreck?" A saying to anyone with a new car/truck, from anyone who wasn't too impressed with the new car/truck.

He was here when "Christ was a pup" - meaning he was Old.

Shetland Sheepdog · Feb 27, 2009

Can't dance, too wet to plow, too windy to haul rocks & my jog suit's in the wash! :roll: :lol:
Dave 8)

biggerred · Feb 27, 2009

When I was in the Army, we had a Sargent that always said "as sure as my A$$hole points to the ground at the position of attention" meaning "you betcha"

barn E · Feb 27, 2009

When I was a teen, Dad would say you'd argue with a sign post. Or you made your bed hard, now lie in it. Use your head for something besides a hat rack. Every dog has his day.

time to lighten up

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