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Helping others!

M

Mark W.

Member
We had some substantial snow here in NW Pa the last few days and with the first of the real heavy snow comes the people in the ditches that don't slow down. Many confident FWD drivers in the ditch. I pulled 4 vehicles out on saturday alone. Some really deep in. After insisting that they hook the chain to their own vehicle I was able to get them all out with little trouble. Now the rant, NOT ONE person offered anything for my assistance. I would not have accepted any money but was just wandering what happened to people. It seems that 5-10 yrs. ago almost everyone offered something.
 
Shows of appreciation, thankfulness, and down right common manners are lacking in our "modern society"

I think Walt7777777 sums up that attitude
 
They feel it's your duty, look at all the other hand outs most people have come to expect. Your a good man for helping who needs it. My policy had been that older people and nice looking women always are no charge, every one else $20. I'm married now so I had to change that to most anyone I do what I can for free. I usually hook it up myself if I KNOW I can hook to a safe place to pull from, I just cant see myself letting some old lady or gent crawl down in the snow to wrap a chain on something. I do not charge because I (believe) I am more liable if I am charging a fee. No matter who it is they are always thankful, but I live in the Minnesota country, some make offers, but I always have a good feeling when I see the relief on their face as they drive away. Good deeds are good deeds!
 
I definitely agree that good deeds are just that. If it is a woman or an elderly person I will def. hook up the chain. I have just heard too many horror stories about vehicles being damaged when there is no "good point to hook.
 
Just a guess here, but as more and more folks make the majority of their purchases with credit or debit cards, they may not have adequate cash to make you anything other than an insulting offer.

On the other hand, they could offer to send you something.
 
I live right on a curve on a main road. Cars are off the road here good weather and bad. I don't even get out of my chair anymore unless they come knocking on the door. If they do ask,they have to hook the chain and I have my hand out before they unhook it. I could tell you so many stories of ingrates. I really felt bad about that attitude a month ago though. There was a pickup off the curve at 9am on a Sunday morning. Another pickup stopped. He came running out of the ditch,grabbed his cell phone and was pacing in the road. I heard the ambulance coming while he was still on the phone,so I didn't go down there. Well...it was a friend of mine. He'd had a heart attack and was dead.
 
We had cattle scattered out at several farms with in a couple of miles of each other. I would start my orning chores with a loader tractor and no cab clearing drive ways of snow as I fed at the various farms. Being a nice guy I would stop and clear out neighbors drives as I went past until,,,,,,,,,a neighbor called a few hours later to complain that the county snow plow pushed a little bit of snow in their drive along the road and were upset that I had not ran back and cleared it out for them free of charge. Of course they have never ever offered to pay me so I discontinued my services to the rude bas*#!!ds after that.
 

At least they didn't sui you for damaging their vehicle (yet) :roll:

You should have made your quota, the rest should be decent folks. If not, take a different route.


Dave
 
That's like the story that I used to tell about helping a pregnant woman out of the ditch. She said "I'm not pregnant". I said "you're not out of the ditch yet either".
 
I usually plow the neighbors drives around me with my skidloader . Can;t stand to see old folks out risking heart attack . 3 houses, not that bad to do . However ,I will rethink that this year . I had my Cube van beside house , had flat tire . City called says "A" neighbor turned me in for not having van parked on hard surface <driveway > No vehicles ,RV's Boats etc parked anywhere but on paved areas . Hate to make other suffer for one that called it in . Guess I will bite the bullet and still plow them . Although I was thinking about putting 2 or 3 bathtubs cut in half , set up right in yard with statue in them , or maybe a goat or two ,,,or Hubcap collection nailed to side of house ,,,lol Or some real awfull xmas decorations and leave them up year round .
 
Was asked by neighbor to Lift a large wooden beam, about 45 minutes of work with backhoe ---Thanks so much-- no offer for pay!
Would have done this for free, not next time!
 
I too like you likely would of helped them out,as I have needed help before.

Now in our state Ohio it is a mandatory fail to control charge if you call the tow truck so you are talking really expensive ! Maybe next time just offer to call a tow truck for them.

I am still kinda half mad at myself for not makeing the battery truck guy call one years back.
I told him not to even bother coming up the drive in bad weather, but he didn't listen. I was able to get him out,barely,and spent alot of time doing it. He never even offered to give me anything or even a battery. Afterall I'm sure I saved him plenty of money a large tow truck would of cost plus who knows ? that could of been the last straw and his job may of been on the line ? He could of offered !
 
I"m pretty much done being the mr nice guy helping stranded motorists anymore. I would offer the use of the phone but most of them have cell phones so they can fend for themselves. I could write a book about all the good will free work I have done out here for people. My cousin lives down the road and he"s pretty much done after an incident this summer. We were combining wheat this summer and saw a guy go by with an old tractor behind a new Ford Super duty on a really small trailer. I saw the wheel bearing smoking. He got 2 more miles and ended up in front of my cousins house. This 20 something got out and my cousin and his friends ended up running him to the store to get a new bearing kit, had to get a new rim, tire, and used all my cousins jacks and blocks in my cousins driveway. They spent about 3 hours with this jackoff, drove him all over getting the tire and wheel mounted,fixed the bearing, and gave him a spare tire and wheel he had there. After they got done the kid jumped in his truck and took off without even saying thank you or offering to even pay for the tire, rim, or gas for running him around. He was telling my cousin they were "big farmers". Well if your reading this mr "big farmer", my cousin says to kiss his @ss!
 
One word...Entitlement. Nowdays people have this sense that everyone is obligated to help them. Oddly enough, the ones with the most obvious sense of entitlement are the LAST to offer to help anyone else. Almost makes me glad I'm getting old and my time is about over with.
 
I know the feeling. My old converted Gypsy friend explained it to me, though. He said that according to his bible, when people repay you (either with money or appreciative words) for your deeds of kindness, you have been fully paid. However, when you receive no payment of any kind, your reward awaits you in Heaven. He said that he always felt good twice - once for the warmness it brought to his heart to do good and a second time when he thought of his rewards building up in Heaven.

I guess from the sound of things, God has about as many IOU's as our blessed Treasury Department!
 
I have to agree with the other posts. Several years ago, if you locked yourself out of your car, the police would come open it for you. That was until someone sued saying they damaged their car. So now call a locksmith and pay $$$$.

I think ya"ll are right about the entitlement attitude and sue if you do any damage (and even if you don"t, they"ll claim old damage was your fault).

Sorry for the cynical attitude. James and I never stop to help even though our big truck could pull most folks out. Its just too risky.
 
I stopped doing things like that except for friends and family years ago. A local guy got stung for damages to the tune of $10,000 3 years ago. $6,000 for a damaged bumper and $4,000 in punitive damages as a thank you for pulling a yuppie"s SUV out of a ditch. Somebody needs help? I just call my friend Sutty and all is handled.
 
There is a good simaritan law here in Germany. You have to carry a first aid kit, rubber gloves, safety vest, and a blanket if you pass by an accident, you can be charged. Not as strictly enforced these days, but still there. The other night, there was a documentary on TV where they were testing folks with a staged accident. The police would take a picture of passing cars and radio a cop down the road to stop the car and ask why they didn't stop. Some said they didn't see anything until thecop showed them the picture of them slowing down to look, one said they had an appointment, and another one said that if the folks couldn't learn to drive, he didn't have time for them. All were German. Of the 15 or 20 that stopped, 2 were German, the rest were Turks, Russians, Greek, and Polish. Guess that goes to the comfort and entitlement arguement.
I ran out of gas once on the Autobahn (big NOGO) and was walking to the next exit (bigger NOGO) in broad daylight. Noone stopped to offer a ride, two cops passed and didn't even stop to give ma a ticket, and a few folks gestured their IQ. A truck driver from Kosovo stopped with a double trailer, took me to the gas station and back to my car and waited til I drove off. Cost him a good hour and he wouldn't take anything. I had his name and got the company address off his truck and sent him a bottle of Jack Daniels (don't know if he got it).

Dave
 
Yep,there was a gal coming up the road a couple of years ago in the snow. Her front tire was going flat on her van and she was having trouble getting up the hill. I pulled her in the driveway and up to the shop doors. She said her husband was in Iraq,she was headed to town for a doctors appointment,a real sob story. I changed her tire,had to hunt up some lug nuts since she had thick mag type wheels and they wouldn't work on the thin steel spare. The tread had come right off the tire by the time I got her up here. Anyway,I was eating supper that night and the manager of the tire store came knocking on the door. Wanted to know what happened. She went in there,said the tire had exploded,she went in the ditch and was hurt,had to go to the doctor for her injuries and she was going to sue them since they had installed the tire that went flat. If that wheel had come loose that I changed and gave her the lug nuts for,she'd have been threatening me for sure. You JUST don't dare do anything for anybody no matter how sorry you feel for them.
 
Surprised no one mentioned this angle- maybe not a big problem in other areas of the country. Several instances on the Interstate of people stopping to help someone in distress, turns out it was "staged", and the good samaritan gets robbed at gunpoint (or worse) for his troubles. No more for me, thanks.

I do remember pulling a local kid out of the ditch with my tractor some years back. He said, I don't have any money, but be thinking of projects you need done, 'cause I'm coming Saturday afternoon to give you a hand. We cut, split and hauled quite a bit of firewood that day, as I recall. Of course, it probably helped that I knew the family, and graciously offered not to call his dad with the news that he was a bit "impaired" that night. But not impaired enough to forget his manners.

I also helped an elderly gent fix his fuel pump back in about '67, beside the freeway. We ended up going to a wrecking yard and getting him an electric fuel pump (he insisted on buying one for me, as well)- I came back and got it plumbed and wired, got the car going, and he reached for his wallet- pulled out a 20, I said, no that's too much- you already bought me the fuel pump- he said, sorry, thats the smallest bill I have (which I could see wasn't true). 20 bucks was two days pay in those days.
 
Most people I've pulled out still offer something... a few haven't even said 'thanks'. Peoples' willingness to sue and liability have cut back on what I'm willing to do. Unless it's someone who shouldn't be doing stuff like that, I make them hook the chain on their vehicle.
 
Don't feel too bad - that behavior seems to be getting more common all the time.

I live on top of very steep, dirt, mountain road that is sheer ice most of the winter - if not deep in wind-blown snowdrifts. Town does not salt my end because it's dirt.

Most rational people don't drive on in the winter. My wife and I have too, since we live here. But, I always keep one 4WD truck handy with chains on all four wheels - for when things get real bad.

Last year, a new distant neighbor from the city - came flying down the hill in her new SUV, skid sideways and went into the woods across from my house. I pulled her out, and then warned her that she'd be better off not driving on this section of the road in winter since it gets so bad. Where she lives, she has the option of taking a fully maintained town road that is sanded and salted, etc.

Well, that night her husband called me. Not to thank me for pulling her out, more to tell me off about "how dare I tell his wife not to use the road." I then told them that the next time his wife landed in my woods, I would not pull her out again. Then?? He said if his wife ever goes off the road, and I refuse to help, he's going to sue me.
Later, he called the town's highway supervisor and threatened to sue the town if they don't improve the road on my end, provide school bus service, etc.

I think I need to move one more time in my life and try to escape this kind of nonsense. Problem is, I'm not sure if there is anywhere left to go.
 
(quoted from post at 10:34:33 11/24/08) He said if his wife ever goes off the road, and I refuse to help, he's going to sue me.
Later, he called the town's highway supervisor and threatened to sue the town if they don't improve the road on my end, provide school bus service, etc.

I think I need to move one more time in my life and try to escape this kind of nonsense. Problem is, I'm not sure if there is anywhere left to go.
Click to expand...

Take a SWAG as to how they voted.

[size=18:324d136ce8][b:324d136ce8]YES WE CAN!!!![/b:324d136ce8][/size:324d136ce8]
Sorry folks I'm on a 12 hour shift with a TV blairing news at me and been hearing the savior most of the day. Just finished the introductions of the holy financial gurus.....

Dave
 
I pulled a car out of the ditch for a lady a few years ago on HWY 169 near Minneapolis. No sooner than I pull her out, the state partrol officer is giving me a speech for an "illegal tow" because I don"t have the appropriate warning lights on my personal truck. Then he wanted to make sure she didn"t pay me for helping out because that was illegal too. I didn"t ask for money. It was rush hour, traffic was at a crawl, she looked like she needed some help. I saw no danger in offering to pull her out of the ditch.

So now I am familiar with the "metro" highway codes. Guess I just will have join the other GAWKers looking at the people stuck on in the ditch from now on.
 

My thoughts....
A lot of people don't have any CASH to offer
A lot of people feel "you owe it" to help them.

I have had a few promise to come back,don't ever remeber but one coming back,and he returned to steal gas,after he saw where it was kept,when I helped him.
 
last Monday I pulled into The Home Depot and saw a guy looking at his trailer lights, I went in and did my shopping came back out and he was still there. I offered to help and spent 2+ hours chasing wires plug corroded at truck, pigtail wired wrong, and bulb contacts were bent away from bulbs. When I was done the guy sounded sincere in his thanks and that he was doing his cousin a favor to go and pick up some Christmas trees in Tennessee 6 hour drive. He told me he didn't have any $ but if I wanted to I was welcome to come by and get a tree.I told him I was glad to help and it was no trouble. I decided I would take him up on his offer and when I went to his cousin's tree stand his cousin told me he paid him the $20 I charged to fix the lights and he was paid to make the trip not a favor. I tried to get him to call his cousin down there but he wouldn't answer the phone. He wound up taking $20 off a $40 tree so it was ok for some type of reward but I told him I was just trying to help and didn't expect payment but he offered a tree and $20 was not enough if I was expecting payment electrical problems are a big pain in the rear.I sat around talking to him for about a hour and he took my # and said he would call if he needed some other work done and he found out later his cousin had in fact scammed him on other things on that trip.
 
Anybody can sue you (or your insurance co.) but they don't always collect a dime. Neighbor ran over my cow and killed it he wanted me to pay for his damaged to his truck. I turned it over to my ins. They told him where to go.
Walt
 
About once a year someone drives off the road or gets hit and winds up in my fence. My big Bull will sit up on the hill and watch the people so they won't come across the fence.
Once a guy on motor cycle hit some gravel left by the county and slid right off, he was hurt real bad neck injury. The next day his kids cam by and we pulled the Motorcycle out and took it to his house. he so grateful that he came out when he was doing somewhat better to thank me. Real nice guy and family some people just make you feel good when you help them.
Walt
 
Gee, I sure wish I hadn't read this thread. Maybe I'll get a cup of coffee and reminisce about where, when and how I was raised, which really was not all that long ago.

I have never gotten help on the roadside or anywhere else that I didn't express profuse thanks. Fortunately my driving has gotten better the last many years and I have not gotten stuck as often. (Sound of a knocking on wood....)

Christopher
 
And to think a couple years back I got stuck somewhere I shouldn't have been and gave the old black man $120 (all I had) for pulling me out. He insisted that it was free, but I let him know a tow truck, the DUI, and the butt whoopin from dad would have cost a lot more. He never told on me either.
 
I have only had one bad experience pulling people out, young kid hooked up his car wrong, I pulled his front bumper off. But I help everybody I can, everything seems to work for me.
 
I"m all done helping people except good friends and family and occasionally the neighbors. I"ve been stuck with a hefty bill the last couple times somebody missed the corner and went through our fence and got stuck on the dike/in the field. The last guy to go through the fence tried to take me to court for damaging his car. I argued that he shouldn"t have been there because he was on PRIVATE PROPERTY! He was driving on my driveway! And he wouldn"t have missed the corner if he wasn"t going so fast. Let"s just say I won the case. End of story.
 
whenever I hook someone out I'd like them too ask "what do I owe ya?" "what's it worth to ya??" usualy get 5-10 bucks and I take it; wrecker would cost couple hundred bucks easy.
 
in NY if your cow is loose and gets hit on the road you are held responsible for damages.On the other hand if you hit someones horse you are responsible for all damages.Go figure!
 
Yeah, I totally understand where you're coming from. But random acts of kindness work wonders, you should feel good about yourself, you know? And if the other people don't do anything, that doesn't make you lesser.

Sorry for "preaching".
 
We live near a "T" road and have more than my share of oppotunities to pull people out of the ditch in the winter.Because of the liability I generally won't do it. Made a few exceptions over the years and all have been very appreciative, with one notable exception. I'll never pull another driver for the Amish out, and if I get a chance I'll push him further in myself. One out of many isn't a bad average, but I do remember it.
Paul
 
A guy pulled me out of a ditch after a few too many "brown frosties" a few years ago. I asked what I owed him and he said $10.00. All I had was a 20. So I asked if he'd take a check. He said, "No" and I said "Okay. Thanks." Maybe in hind sight I should have given him the 20. I do stop if a woman has a problem, even though there's not much I can do for them. However, I would NEVER offer a lone woman a ride anywhere. My wife went in the ditch last winter and a guy stopped and let her use his cell to call me.

Larry in Michigan
 
Depends on the person. Neighbors im happy to plow out in winter (no charge) and if the need arose i'd pull them out as well. Average person is on their own. People in this town are the most stuck up and meanspirteted i've ever known (in general).

I will plow snow for a few houses. Yuppies are on their own since someone scolded me for messing up their driveway with my tractor. A handful of people in the village up the road can pay me to do it if im going out there allready, but most people here get the same self-centered cold shoulder they give me. Their problem, see how they like it.
 
Ive heard them all in this worthless dishonest town. Dont let them try to huminize you (using your name, coutrtsy), and NEVER let them offer you anything in the future for your services, unless you can get it in writing and its big enough to fight for when the sh^t hits the fan.

This is if theyre a total stranger. I have alot of good friends in this town i'd do anything for (free of charge) theres just alot more total strangers who will, given 1/2 a chance, walk all over you. Be careful.
 
26 Red, I like your handle! My best buddy used to "roll in the hay" with a big ole" red headed girl when he had a few beers in him. We nicknamed her "26 red" because her thighs were 26" around, same as his waist!
 
I have helped plenty of people out of places they shouldn't be, especially in Nebraska winters. I was out busting snow drifts one Sunday after church with my 4x4 Dodge just for fun, was living in Lincoln, NE at the time. I had chains for it but forgot them at home, so I wasn't too brave on big long drifts. But wind was really coming up, I started back home, came upon a couple older people trying to deliver the Sunday papers, very very stuck with their 4x4. Another 10 minutes Ithink he would have died trying to dig it out, he was badly frostbit already. I pulled them out, and told them to follow. 10 minutes later, they still aren't to clear road. I went back, he was stuck in next drift. He said he thought he could take time to get warmed up before he followed and maybe finish the paper route. I made it clear it was too bad to bust back thru and save him again. Told him to just go to a hospital on the 4 lane, I got him to the 4 lane. Hope he did. Would I save him again? Probably, but make it clear he stays only one snowdrift back from me so he has time to stop if I bury my 4x4. DOUG
 
If they are that generous put a price on it BEFORE you pull them out, would a tow truck charge?? {like a wounded bull}
 
What a nerve. The guy pulled you out and you would not even give him a lousy 20 dollar bill for it. That kind of attitude is why many folks wont help anyone these days. You really insulted the man by asking him if he would take a check. He is probably still telling folks about his encounter with you. Tom
 
And where, pray tell, was PENNDOT? (The world,s worst excuse for a highway dept). I encountered snow all the way from Gary, Indiana to Stroudsburg and not a problem until Pennsylvania. Plenty of big tow trucks pulling tractor trailers out of ditches, plenty of Penn SP cars BUT NO PENNDOT TRUCKS! Not a bit of sand or salt put on roadway. Do they have something on the Governor that they can just set there own rules? Oh, by the way, PENNDOT is most famous for painting a line stripe across the carcass of a dead deer. They thought that was pretty funny until newspaper and TV got hold of it. One time a news station went out looking for a PENNDOT truck in a raging blizzard. They found a PENNDOT truck and crew patching potholes. PENNDOT is the world's worst excuse for a highway dept and they keep one-upping themselves. I really think 300 years of inbreeding has something to do with it.
 
Why should you get a medal for basic human kindness? Bad weather, woman/kid alone, unsafe to continue; just do it because you would want someone to do the same for yours.
 
Too many people think that everybody else is just waiting around in case they need something. Twenty some years ago, someone came knocking on our door at about 8 am on a Sunday morning. They went in the ditch and needed a tow. I went outside and the guy told me that another neighbor had told him that his tractor was broke. I took our tractor to go pull him and his friends out. The car was an old POS without even a hood and couldn't get traction on the wet grass. This was in the summer. I knew there was nothing wrong with the neighbors tractor. I pulled them out and wanted to push them back in, when the guy said, "I'd offer you something but spent all my money on last night at the bar. Then they just took off. It really depends on who needs a tow. We had a guy hit the ditch behind our subdivision because he was quite impaired and the neighbor wouldn't pull him out because he was drunk. Half an hour later a tow truck showed up. 5 minutes later the tow truck left. All night long every 5 or 10 minutes you'd hear the guy spinning his tires like an idiot trying to get out. My neighbor finally went and pulled him out after he figured he sobered up a bit. If someone hit the ditch because they were impaired, that's the best place for them and I'm not going to pull them out. The guys I pulled out weren't drunk, just cheap. Dave
 
Some people have grown up with out a little private personal "respect" session ever in their lives. A little "attitude adjustment" is needed in this fellas case :)
 
If you have doubts, make your deal before helping. Have lawyer make up a "hold harmless" chit for them to sign. Navy used these years ago for civilians using military swimming pool. Lawyers please comment. Was in the sixties. Once pulled out a car and they ran into my vehicle. When I said how about a little compensation, they said well that car's pretty beat up already. It wasn't. My bad. Used to love to help other drivers.
 
I agree with the comments above about liability...I personally won't pull vehicles out of ditches, simply for that reason. What happens if their vehicle gets damaged, or they get hurt in the process, etc. and they decide to take you for all your worth? I'm not willing to take that risk.
 
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