jon f mn
Well-known Member
Spent the day at the UofM today for my semiannual checkups. Along with seeing a bunch of doctors and doing a bunch of tests, this is the glass coffin they put me in to see if I'm dieing. They put you in and seal the door,it makes a shoooop sound just like on tv. Then they hook up the air compressor and pump up the pressure to 140psi or so, while they try blow your eyes out of your skull through your ears. The whole time the opperator lady sits there filing her nails with a smirk on her face telling you to breath normal while your chest colapses from the pressure as she watches the line on the graph get closer to the red line that says "dead". Just before you hit the line she cuts the compressor and throws the valve psheeewww, for an emergency blow and relieves the pressure, laughing gleefully. Just about the time you think you can take a breath she hooks up a vacuum and starts trying to suck your eyes out through your ears while telling you to breath normal, while smileing gleefully and filing her nails and watching the line go down to the red line below that says dead.
When they are all done, if you didn't croak, they say "see, your not dieing". If you croak, they say "see, we told you you were dieing" and they tell your family that they never saw you because you never showed up for your appointment.
Its just a coincidence that every time that happens the Chinese restaraunt down the street has kung pao chicken on special for the next two weeks.
When they are all done, if you didn't croak, they say "see, your not dieing". If you croak, they say "see, we told you you were dieing" and they tell your family that they never saw you because you never showed up for your appointment.
Its just a coincidence that every time that happens the Chinese restaraunt down the street has kung pao chicken on special for the next two weeks.