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Things dad used to say

jon f mn

jon f mn

Well-known Member
Had a minor breakdown today and stopped at a local shop for repair. The mechanic was a good mechanic and worked fast when he had a wrench in his hand, but watching home walk from the truck to the parts counter was painful because he was so slow. He didn't have a disability that I could see, and he moved fine while working, it's just that walking wasn't his thing. Made me think of my dad who would have said "he was so slow you had to drive a stake in the ground beside him so you could measure to see if he was moving". Lol, I was grinning the whole time thinking about dad.
 
When I was little my Grand Mother didn't like the old mail man. He drove a Model A Ford and as Grand Ma says he was always late. We never got any mail any way but she thought he should be on time. She called him Old Steap na Fetchit. I still laugh all these 70 or more years later. LOL . Old Scovy.
 
Not a saying but worked with a young man when he was still in high school we nicknamed him LG , always in low gear.
 
Having had one knee replacement and the second one is about ready to go south on me, I can do lots of stuff as quick as ever while standing pretty much still (like a working mechanic could do) ...... but the journey to and from the parts counter would be a slow and painful one. Not saying this was the case with the garage you were at but it's a possibility. What's the old expression ..... "Walk a mile in his shoes" or worse yet, walk a mile in his shoes with a bad knee, hip, ankle, or back.
 
Working in a factory a tour group came through we were rebuilding parts anyway they gathered around one guys bench and watch him at work. Later he was so proud that they had stopped at his bench finally i turned to him and asked do you know why they choose you ? The place became silent when he finally asked why i said thats because they wanted to see it done in slow motion ! He wasn't as amused as the rest of the place.
 
Whenever I'd put on a set of gloves for ANY reason Dad would say "a cat in a sack can't catch mice". He would almost never put on gloves for hot work or cold. He's been gone 17 years, and I still go to the toolshed/shop and sit there in silence and listen to him.
 
Anything my dad didn't understand, or anything that changed his own little routine, he simply declared it to be "Humbug", and that was that.
 
When told he needed to move faster, an old friend of mine would say, "I got 2 speeds. If you don't like this one, you da*n sure won't like the other one".
Richard in NW SC
 
A couple from my dad: "It would take two of him to make a wit." And one of my favorites: If you don't use your head, you might as well have two a$$es.
 
When I would grumble about the early hour when I had been chase a girl half the night. He would laugh and say "It's hard to soar with the eagles when you've been hootin' with owls all night."
I find I use that sentence a lot these days.
 
"If the good lord intended everyone to see the sunrise he would have made it come up at noon."

(In German) "If the hound wouldn't have stopped to take a $*!T he would have caught the rabbit"

"If your gonna be stupid you better be rugged"
 
When I was young and my brothers and cousins would get to wrasslin' somebody would always get mad and it would turn into a little dust up. At that point my Grandfather would step in and say, "knock it off you two or I'll rip your arm off and beat you over the head with the bloody end!" Of course we would stop and to this day we laugh about it, it's not bad enough that he was going to rip our arms off he'd beat us with the bloody end!
 
Dad was having trouble getting a pin in and said it was "Like fighting Indians with a broken rifle"..
 
I was helping dad re-install a radiator shroud on a 4430 that had to be pop-riveted, if memory serves. The first time he put it on backwards, just got mad, drilled out the rivets and set it up to rivet again. The second time he put it on backwards he looks at me and says, "you know Mike, if I could, I would kick my own a$$ right now!" We both laughed, and got it on correctly the 3rd time. I still laugh about it and that was 30-some years ago.

Mike
 
went out to the field with dad in his 1955 gmc 1/2 ton, i was about 10. i had some candy cigarette's and said im gonna have a smoke. he said "you smoke and i'll box your ears". out of 6 of us kids im the only one that dont smoke.lol. parents didnt either.
 
I like this one but dont remember where I heard it -- about as worthless as a ball bat at a football game -- sounds like something old foghorn leghorn ( the rooster ) would say to that little chicken hawk just before that little guy would buzz all his feathers off--He He! Roy --PS still gigglin
 
Whenever something didnt go right,dad would say " One of them deals !" Another one was when somebody was passing around a bottle. "that aint no telescope son, take a drink and pass it on "
 
Since I was a kid, I was always modifying things to make them better. My Radio-Flyer wagon had automotive steering rather than 5th wheel steering thanks to my now 98 year old neighbor who ran a machine shop after he came home for the War.
My dad was the type of guy that said if it works don't mess with it, but our ideas clashed quite often.
Don't take me wrong here;; My dad taught me a lot, but our neighbor was very patient with me, and found time to tolerate my ideas and make them realities.
I still am an innovator and have the tools to make my innovations reality, thanks to what my good neighbor taught me about welding and fabrication.
<Loren
 
I sort of got side tracked her with my first post, But my Dad often replied when I said "I thought it would work" and didn't do as I thought, He would say "THAT is where Thought gets you".
I always found that statement to be very disappointing.
Loren
 
"What do you want a medal or the chest ta pin it on". Then he would slug me in the chest. LOL That was on a good day.
 
My dad would scold people who would mess something up cause they were in a rush "if you ain't got time to do it right where in he He11 are you going to find the time to do it over"? I used that a lot on my own kids as they were growing up.

Rick
 
I knew a Lieutenant in the Marine Corps who had an engraved plaque on the wall of his office that said, "Illegitimus Non Carborundum". It loosely translated to, "Don't Let The Bastards Grind You Down".
 
Worked with a guy one time, who could work all day and not get anything done.
We decided if you took his brain and put it in the head of an ant,
it would roll around like a BB in a boxcar.

'Nother guy could talk all day and not say a word.
 
Not my dad, but a good guy who just passed on used to say- About as handy as a one legged man in an a$$ kicking contest. I'll never forget that.

BJ-WI
 
Dad had a saying that could be applied to almost any situation in life ...and he was correct! " If you can't afford to lose....you can't afford to gamble" !
 
he really had a bunch of good advice, but here are three, don't worry about the rumors if you need to know find the people and ask them, the cows come first if you and whoever else don't understand you need to move on or have no cattle, but this one he told to my cousin and I over a pulling tractor we were pulling against each other and our next door neighbor and we all worked on each others tractor, well as luck would have it we all had full pulls now in todays world everyone wants to split; my dad looked at all three of us and "no one paid to see you split" so we had the pull off and always have no matter who else was pulling.
 
I was loading the weights for our pulling tractor, grabbed 2 hundred pounders, took em to the truck, stacked em in the bed to which he observed: a strong man will hurt his back. I shot back, a strong man won't if he can do it. Nevertheless, ain't picked up two at a time since then. DP
 
My dad was a religious man, not given to strong language. "Ah, horsefeathers" was his favorite saying when he became frustrated. I did not inherit his sense of restraint.
 
" Nothing is as simple as just turning wrenches!" (There is always something more to deal with.)
 
Grandpa would say: Wow, to listen to that fella talk, you'd think he was around when they put the salt in the ocean.
 
My dad was retired after I started farming. He would help out when we got busy with field work or haying. Mom would most times fix big noon meal for the crew. Once we had eaten our fill, just about time food comma is kicking in, dad would say,?I heard it thunder?. Which meant break time was over. Our son is teaching it to his son.
 

Not my Dad, but another older fellow who used to work at the same place I did. When I would come to work in the morning I would say, "Well, Oscar, what do you know this morning?" He would answer, "It wouldn't make a very thick book!"
 
My father had five half brothers. Their father once said he'd have been money ahead if he'd raised that many head of hogs instead of "them _________ __________ boys".

I could see his point. From stories I heard, their idea of fun was to go to a nearby town on Sunday afternoon and shoot the windows out of the grain elevator.
 
My Dad used to tell me, there are two ways in life to make a living, one is with your brain, the other is with your back. It's your choice. Only took me forty some years to figure it out.
 
Dad used to say,"Never hire a man who wears a straw hat or smokes a pipe." His reasoning? One is always chasing his hat, the other always fussin with his tobacco.
 
My dad would say, "Any job worth doing is worth doing right". He would also say, "If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself". He never said both in reference to the same thing...
 

Dad used to say "you can put a tuxedo on a hog, but it's still a hog." Referring to dressed up idiots.
 
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