OT Just Venting

Hi fellas,
Have had a really busy year so haven't been on here much over the summer.I thought maybe getting on here and just typing might help. My Dad has had heart problems since 1970,since then he has had other health issues with the most recent being prostate problems throughout all of last winter and about a month ago was diagnosed with alzheimers.He was always a tough old bird ,but last week his heart just stopped.In a way this is a good thing , now he is all done with the suffering and pain.He was my best friend and mentor, but I guess I ignored the lessons how to cope with losing him. Today we are burying him, most of the relatives have made it back for the service.He was 85 ,had a tough life,but good life.
He always seemed to want to do things the hard way,but, by god, he did it his way.I do better if I stay busy at something,when I relax or just do nothing ,my brain starts reflecting,and I lose it a little.Maybe after today it will get easier.
Yesterday I considered the idea of finishing the jobs I have on my job schedule then pack it in.I won't do that though ,that was just a weak moment, I'll never really quit.
I know you fellas are going to send all kinds of
wellwishing and sympathy, and I may or may not
respond but will thank you now for them. As work starts to slow down ,I will get on here more often. See you soon Glenn

Thank you. I tried to type something beyond that, but nothing fits. Thank you.

Hang in there. It is always tough losing someone you love. Lost my dad to a heart attack when I was nine years old. Tough growing up without him but I made it.

hang in there ,come type to us we are here ,sorry to hear of your loss,,,Larry

You hang in there. You have years of fond memories to look back on. Prayers for you and your family for the Lord's peace and comfort.

"New beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad, but ITS WHATS IN THE MIDDLE THAT COUNTS"

"What thought the radiance once so bright be now forever taken from my sight, though nothing can bring back the hour of splendor in the grass of glory in the flower, we will grieve not, rather find strength in what remains behind"

"Though weeping may endure through the night, joy cometh in the morning"

May not be the exact quotes, but may bring you some comfort

God Bless

John T
Grandpa

Thank you for "venting".
Look at all his accomplishments and remember the good times. Prayers for your healing.

I've said it before I'll say it again.

The one thing I learned when I lost my dad was that whether you're 6 or 60, you don't truly become a man till the day your lose your father.

At first it was a lonely feeling, of being left alone, but then I realized it was not so much a loss, but more of a passing of the torch.

That realization got me over the pain. I hope you reach the same feeling.

And speaking as a father, if he had a son who considers him a best friend, well then he couldn't have asked for much more than that - he left the world a happy man.

Sounds a lot like my dad. Always working the hard way. Learned a lot from him. Told me. When I die. That will make you head of the family. I expect you to keep working and take care of the family. I am the oldest at 63. Me and the youngest kid in the family. My brother sit around at times and compare Dad. From the time I left in 1968 to when he grew up with him. Not much changed.Lot of funny stories about dad and baling wire.

Glenn,
This too shall pass.

Grieving is as individual as fingerprints. When you learn the bases and the reasons (yes reasons), for grieving it makes it easier, and understandable.

First understand that it is part of Gods plan, for the deceased and then for the survivors.

THE deceased;
Gods word says 70 or 80 years to a man... Our (even yours) is mortal, it goes back to God. It was originally designed to stay with the man and man was to never die.

THE survivor;
Grieving is a slower process than that of an all of a sudden stop. In fact grieving can and often does begin when a loved one has health problems and death lingers on, as your Father did. Some folks carry this hurt for decades, another sibling or relative only for a few days. Some get 'stuck' in grief too, be careful of that one.

I found support ay the local church. They were offering grief counseling for free. You had to buy the $17 workbook. You can go to griefshare.org and find sessions going on in your area.

You will always remember your loved one, and death will always have a sting. Carolyn passed away at home 6 months ago, it is the hardest thing, to date, in my life, but I'm moving forward, bit by bit. While it was the hardest thing, taking care of her was such a great blessing, difficult at times, but a wonderful experience, I hope you were able to have this part of the experience.

I don't know how close you were when he was in his last days, months or years, sounds like you were close by. Yeah!
Where is Mom or his wife in all of this?

Don't forget to eat. People will say 'off' remarks, forgive them as they too are grieving and just don't know how to handle it.

Its okay to cry too.....

just steve now

Opened my Bible to the front last night and saw my notes. My dad passed in 1989. Hard to believe its been that long.

You will stop hurting, you will never stop thinking about him.

Just keep on being the man you dad made you and make him proud.

When Mother passed on I took it well just remembering the good times we had.
My brother passed away this spring and it still wells me up thinking about him. We were very close only 18 months between our ages. We did everything together for many years hunting fishing swimming water skiing and much more.
You will wonder why it's like this when someone passes on but it's life we all do it sooner or later.
Bless you and your family and I hope you get back to life soon your family needs you to be the old man now.
Tell your grandchildren about your father tell the good the bad and the funny things that did over his 85 years.
I never new my Father and have no idea as to what others have experienced but from the stories on here I can see what I have missed.
Walt

Down the road you WILL remember all the things he told you you were "SUPPOSED" to do. 'Not just tasks, but life's lessons. You're not left alone now. He will always be with you in your mind.....always just right there.

I brought back all my Dad's tools. They are spread throughout the shop now but I know every one of them. There are some odd-balls that are real problem solvers and a lot of others for everyday use. These tools keep me conected with him. Not a project goes by without me putting my hand on at least one of his tools and my saying, "Thanks Dad." He was ailing. I had put off seeing him for trivial reasons that didn't amount to more than inconveniencies. I was finally making plans to see him when I got the call. He died in the company of strangers. Using his tools is the best I can do.

Glenn, it's not 'venting'. Your Dad was part of who you are. My Dad passed 17 years ago, and like you, I have a few of his tools that I still use on occasion. My eyes are blurred from tears at what you are experiencing. It will become a bit easier but don't be ashamed EVER of what your Dad passed on to you.

you need to talk, we can listen, time helps - doesnt stop all of the pain, if he was that good just tell other family members about him and keep on going, your in our prayers

I bought back my granddad"s main toolbox and most of my dads tools they are old ,tarnished nothing spectacular, but I know who"s they were and hope they stay in the family for years to come.

Glen, We all share in your loss. always remember how close you were. I know guys who never bonded with their dad, and always pity those who didn't. Your dad will always be with you, and the great feeling will be it's own reward. Bless your heart. Warmest regards LOU & Family.

Beyond the darkness, light . . . Beyond the sorrow, peace. We wish you everything you need to get through this difficult time.

My Dad died 18 years ago, and I think of him, Mom too, and it's been 42 years for her, often. I'm lucky to have Dad's old Allis-Chalmers and a lot of Moms stuff too. Using their things brings it right up front for me.