My youngest son surprised me this week.

I wrote about how my youngest son was really mad when he found out his older two brothers where buys the two farms. He thought he should have been in "line" to get to buy one of them. Even though he had zero down payment and a third of his brother's income. He has made some stupid mistakes in his young life. He will just turn 21 in March. He has a 4 and 5 year old sons. So he has made some serious misjudgments.

So when he blew up at me over his brothers getting the farms I had a real long heart to heart talk with him. I told him he needed to get his life in order so he could progress forward.

He has trouble finishing things he starts for himself. He has 5-10 projects that he has 75-90% done but then goes and starts something else an never get back to the first thing.

He is great at carburetors on small engine and motorcycles. He also does good custom work on motorcycles. He will finish the work if it is for someone else but rarely himself.

Well he has been working for a welding out fit for 4-6 weeks now. He likes it and is making good money. He also has thinned out his projects by getting some of them done and selling some others that he just does not want to fool with anymore.

He came over yesterday and rode with me to get a welder I had bought off of Craigs list. He told me he wanted to buy the house he was renting from me. He is living in the house that my wife and I bought when I got out of the service. It is an old farm house with about 4 acres of ground and a few out buildings. I do own the rest of the farm around it now but did not when we first bought the house.

I had told him what I wanted for the house when he first moved into it. Between his having a better job and cleaning up the loose ends he had laying around, he has about 15K to make a down payment with. Wow That is great for him !!

So I told him I would sell him the house. I told him that I would help him get it set up through his bank. I think he can borrow the money he needs with the down payment he has. If not then I will take a second mortgage on some of the house to make it work. So he is going in after work tomorrow and get things started. I also told him that he was going to have to do the leg work and get things going.

I hope he is seeing the light. He and I set down and figured out that if he gets a 15 year fixed loan at a reasonable rate his payment will be just a little under his current rent. He will have insurance and taxes but he will be building toward something.

So I am proud that he seems to be trying something different.

PS It sure seems to have both he and his wife in a more ambitious mood. He came by this afternoon to borrow a tile spade. He was hand digging the trench to put 220 electric into an old hog barn that he uses for a shop.( no way to get much use out of a trencher or hoe where the line needs put) I went over late in the afternoon to see how he was getting along. He has the hard part all dug. He should get it done in the next few day after work. The real funny thing is his wife usually just goes through the motions of cleaning. Things not bad but not real spot less either. She was going full out as well. She had all the first floor clean as a pin when I went in. So I hope the two of them have woke up to the fact they need to grow up and do things better to get ahead. Time will tell but it seems to be a start.

Hope if continues that way, you deserve it.

I hope you took your boots off when you went in!
He's young, and I'm glad it sounds like he's growing up.
I made some of the same mistakes he did, when it comes to having kids early.
Looking back now though, I'm young enough to play with my
granddchildren, and probably my great grandchildren.
If they can come to the islands to see me!!!! :lol:
Let us know how it works out. So far so good!

Is his wife the mother of the kids? Just asking here cause in those situations the real mother could be in jail or something. So your son has a 4 and 5 year old and he is 21? That is way to young to have kids. If your son has a good work ethic, And I mean real good where he can work 6-7 days a week then he may do okay. Does his wife have a job?

I don't know but feel some things should be private between a father and son and not be taken public on the internet or even shared with other family members. Confidentiality is key to a good relationship, good, bad or ugly.

(quoted from post at 04:02:29 11/05/12) I don't know but feel some things should be private between a father and son and not be taken public on the internet or even shared with other family members. Confidentiality is key to a good relationship, good, bad or ugly.

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+1

Yeabut........ If ya keep it to yourself, noone can shower ya with praise and ask for recipes for the Spam Soup to nurse to nurse kids back to health..... :shock:
Be nice now....

The things I have talked about one here pertaining to my son are not private things. It is common knowledge. There are many things that he and I talk about that never leave the two of us.

You seem to have missed the point. It seems like he is waking up to the fact he needs to think more long term and work toward having some thing.

Dave I have seen on here where you talk about having a step-son. Would you be glad if he seemed to straighten up???? Maybe not.

Also most of us are not into man purses or horses so we talk about what we like. You can talk about what you like.

My son will work. He just never seemed to have any "plan". Always lived for the moment. Spent his money on crazy things like fancy video games and such.

Yes his wife is the mother of the boys. She does work. It is at McDonald's. She get 30-35 hours each week and it is in the evening so my son can watch the boys. It is just minimum wage but that is what she would make most places. At least she can work when he can watch the boys.

I don't fault him or her for being young parents. I was married at 16. By nineteen had kids too.

I am very glad it appears your son has seen the light. I know how difficult it can be seeing your children straying.
I must say, I really enjoy your posts. You don't just let us see into the mechanical problems you encounter, you let us see the personal issues you face. I can tell by your words that these are things that weigh on your heart and you are sharing these things with us, your friends. Thank you, I respect and admire that.
It has gotten to the point, I don't know why I bother reading Dave2's responses, I am tired of his nagging negative attitude, I can't think of anything I have gained from absorbing his words. Please take his additions with the same weight I have learned to.
I am young enough that I missed the '60s and 70s Deere hayday and enjoy hearing from anyone who can shed some light on how things were. Thank you for not only the knowledge and experiences you share with us but also to see the emotional things you encounter. Sir, you have my respect.

JD
got a 18yr old daughter with 22 year old boyfriend, much same, she found out she is expecting, said i would help them til they get on their feet. He is living with us now, 22 but been in foster care, etc, no one seems to have taught him value of work, explained they can live with us til after baby is born as long as they both work, he got mad, but got a job, not much of job but it is a starting point. Parents always want to see their kids mature and accept responsibility, your son looks like he is getting there,

JDSeller,

Sounds like he and his wife are both growing up. Great of you to be supportive of him.

Nothing wrong with JD sharing things with people he considers friends.

I myself have done so to have people call a grandson who had a brain tumor brain dead.

I'm glad that JD's son seems to have seen the light.

I myself have 7 kids. All are working. No not all have attended college. But I've neve had one in jail and of that I'm very proud. JD you have the right to brag!


Rick

All of you deserve an "A+" for effort. Trying is where everything starts.

Congratulations to all of you JD!

Jd,I will have to agree with Vern on this and disagree with you that this is public knowledge because it shouldn't be.All family matters should stay that way private.Even in family,a lot of things should stay to ones self,not share.You are not the only one,there are a lot of others posting matters better left private.(personal)

(quoted from post at 08:08:02 11/05/12) Jd,I will have to agree with Vern on this and disagree with you that this is public knowledge because it shouldn't be.All family matters should stay that way private.Even in family,a lot of things should stay to ones self,not share.You are not the only one,there are a lot of others posting matters better left private.(personal)

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See, on this we disagree. JD's son made some errors. JD explains what happened and is proud that his son and his DIL have started to turn around and do better. JD also is sharing his joy about this with people he considers his friends. He really can't tell about the good side without telling about the bad.

Rick

Well JD, as you very well know, that "first" child can come at any time. He's "still" only 21 and it takes time to get the boy out of the boy. 'Looks like the transition is taking place.....all for the good. What kind of relationship does he have with his two older brothers? Is it good or antagonistic? I'm hoping that they can be a big influence upon him and his family. That sure would go a long way in helping him and you.

We all need to remember that it was the younger son that was "prodigal" and then came to his senses and went back home ready to go to work.

I admire JD Seller for the way he has put up with your BS!

Maybe we should all hold hands and sing kumbaya.

You and Dave2 should get along just fine, LMAO!

(quoted from post at 09:00:51 11/05/12) Maybe we should all hold hands and sing kumbaya.

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Nope, just you and dave2...he's the one with the purse.

Sorry Dave.

Rick

(quoted from post at 06:13:55 11/05/12) Dave I have seen on here where you talk about having a step-son. Would you be glad if he seemed to straighten up???? Maybe not.

Also most of us are not into man purses or horses so we talk about what we like. You can talk about what you like.

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He did about the same.... Real sh!thead... Put up with him til he stole from his mother and badmouthed her one day.... threw him out and he woke up.... He's got a little crumb snatcher that is given it all back to him with interest so I'm happy..... Some just need a little longer to wake up than others I guess.....

It's not easy to be patient and sometimes it can be harder to make progress for some people versus others. I don't know your area and how easy it is to transition up the career ladder. Around here Mc Donald's is a pretty good accomplishment as the economy here has been dying for over a generation. A lot of under-employment here and as long as a person is not sucking the public assistance teat I would not be critical if a person appears to be under achieving to outsiders. Especially if they are staying to hold a family unit together.

JD, thanks for the post and for not telling the naysayers to KMA. I have a late life surprise son who's just turned 24. I'm beginning to wonder if he'll ever get a job and leave home. He's turned getting an education into a 'job'. He's down to having to take 2 more electives to graduate after this quarter. I try and tell him NOW is the time to start applying for a job and get a blank stare for a reply. I think there's a generation of 'users' out there who ride their parents for way too long. My son lives in my other house on my place, his mother pays for everything, enabling him more than I would. I don't know what these kids are going to do when their parents are gone or get fed up and cut them off. I know I'm partly at fault for letting him skate way too long and will take some of the blame.

The only thing I'd think about doing if I were in your position is to hold the paper on the place myself so when the wife splits it'll be harder for her to get a chunk of the place.

The youngest gets along pretty good with his older siblings. He just is taking longer to understand how life works.

We all usually start out with little and slowly build it up as we go along. His oldest brother is really a whole generation ahead of him. There is 24 years between them. So he has a hard time adjusting to that fact. I try to tell him that he can get there too with hard work and a good long term plan.