OT advice on girlfriends son.

Think there is a stigma concerning the name Josh.Why you ask? well I have a nephew of the same first name. Daughter and SIL treat him with kid gloves. Any thing he needs/wants. He gets. Stealing, cottage break-ins, stealing guns from the folks(Mon & Dad) running up credit card charges, been in jail with 1 felony now and another hearing on the second one commin up in December.Before all the trouble and jail time, I had several long talks with him but I wasted my breath. I advised the SIL it would be of benefit if they placed him in jail at least a couple of states away, that way you couldn't run every week end to put money in his commissary account. The second felony concerns METH.Either he sells it ,makes it, distributes it, what ever. I have washed my hands of it all.When I read The advice given on the girl friends son, I said to myself it must be in the name. Josh is 21 years (same age)old and still doesn't realize that if he doesn't say NO FOR HIMSELF, Some BODY WILL SURELY DO IT FOR HIM.Now the SIL and daughter went and got an attorney from out of this county, I bet the bill is coming to mommy and daddy,as always.I loved the advice you folks gave concerning the girl friends attitude. I read em all. sure has a lot of great suggestions. My Regards LOU.

In the book of Proverbs:

"Beatings purge the inner man"
This "kid" needs to get the crap beat out of him to where he is in the hospital for a month with broken bones. Then, rehab, then maybe the military...If they will take him. (doubt it)

Maybe somebody'll take care of that in jail.
I went to school with a guy who just didn't get it. Wouldn't straighten up for nuthin. His mother said she knew from the first few letters she got from him in prison that he was one scared kid. As far as I know,he only went once. Still lives around here. Seems to have kept his nose clean every since.

I hole heartedly agree. If he was mine, he would be taking his meals standing up, for quite a spell. Now a days, just a spanking would get a parent jail time.These parents keep making excuses for him.He's Bi polar, ad syndrome,needs tranquilizers etc,He has a job so he's straightening out yata yata yata. Granted he is working so he can buy more junk. He Keeps the dealers happy.Sure as heck isn't making restitution for the damage he caused with the first episode of charges,B&E, Dam Lucky no one was at home siting with a loaded gun,.waiting for the door to be kicked in, That would have solved a multitude of problems.Since he was released from jail the first time , he has several jobs that didn't last as long as a feather in a wind storm. LAZY,like the other one. Watches T.V. Plays games. Sells anything his daddy has ,that isn't nailed down. Took the cables off his daddy's welder to wire up speakers on the vehicle mommy and daddy gave over. The new lawyer keeps making appearances in court so the(Lawyer) has an un-limited income ,until the system says enough already. Glad I'm not involved in that mess. You can believe I"ve had my say in the matter. Now it's just wait and see. A length jail time may be just the ticket. Thanks for the replies LOU.

Sorry to say this but this young male will be Dead (Overdose or pizzed off dealer), in prison or hustling money off the street

BTW, while in jail or prison, he will learn all kinds of the "tricks of the trades". I am talkin' about other ways to mess over people!


Jail or prison seems to be one big 'Learning Center' for inmates...not rehabilitation.

Lou,too bad he didnt spend more time with you and Victor,fixing tractors and splitting firewood and raising gardens,it would have done him good, Best of luck to you and your family,,, Larry

(quoted from post at 00:53:22 09/28/12) Sorry to say this but this young male will be Dead (Overdose or pizzed off dealer), in prison or hustling money off the street

BTW, while in jail or prison, he will learn all kinds of the "tricks of the trades". I am talkin' about other ways to mess over people!


Jail or prison seems to be one big 'Learning Center' for inmates...not rehabilitation.

Click to expand...

BTW, Meth will kill him.



Check out this site :


http://www.facesofmeth.us/

Run don't walk away from this whole relationship. It will come around and BITE you in the end.

Glad I always told my kids that if they got a DUI, caught breaking and entering and such I'd bail em out and stand by them to a point......but if they were ever arrested for drugs I'd see em at the trail and would send em birthday and Christmas cards to em in jail. Kids knew ther was no BS there.

Hope this ones gets his head out in time.

Rick

I assume at least some of ya'll are familiar with Thomas Sowell. He's a black conservative newspaper columnist.

He said once that when his sister's children were teenagers, she called them together and gave them the following advice:

"I want you to know that if you ever get into trouble and wind up in jail, by law you're entitled to one phone call. Don't waste your phone call on me".

The kids never got into that situation.

Greg. Pitiful. I Look for that to happen.Nice looking lad, but worthless. Mommy And Daddy keeps bailing him out with money, job searches, providing him with a vehicle after he has wrecked so many. Had a nice S 10 his dad worked on , got the truck in nice condition till the kid went to the woods and used the truck as a bulldozer. all within 2 weeks after it was made running. Daddy forgave him and got him another set of wheels.That family is a three ring circus. Would be Springer material of sorts. Any way folks it happens to some . Really not needed but shows up. Like i've posted so many times, I'M EXTREMELY FORTUNATE TO HAVE A LOVING SON as I have. I'm waiting to see what the 2nd felony brings. Hopefully not a plea bargain down to a misdemeanor I'm staying away from it all. Thanks for the responses. Lots of good advice here. Regards LOU.

There is no advice to give, He's got to work it out on his own. You just have to stand by and give him all the encouragement you can and support him but not financially. Let him get his own lawyer and just hope he learns to live in our society peacefully.

Larry. Thanks for the reply. The lad seen how we live and treat each other, but he only wants what he wants ,and wants it his way NOW. Ive had several conversations with him but doesnt do any good. I've takled to his Mother and Dad, but it all goes in one ear and out the other. Always have excuses handy the next time the shoe falls.
I gave up. Keeping my distances. .Regards LOU.

To me Bi polar is a condition treated by drugs that translate into more, and better ?? drugs till it reaches street level....Back when we were growing up Dads belt took out the Bi Polar...

(quoted from post at 20:58:47 09/27/12) Glad I always told my kids that if they got a DUI, caught breaking and entering and such I'd bail em out and stand by them to a point......but if they were ever arrested for drugs I'd see em at the trail and would send em birthday and Christmas cards to em in jail. Kids knew ther was no BS there.

Hope this ones gets his head out in time.

Rick

Click to expand...

My Dad told me when I was young not to call home if I got arrested. If I was smart enough to get my a$$ locked up, I could be smart enough to get it out. Also told me if I ever raised my voice or my hand to my mother, he would throw me through the wall and kill me if I crawled back in. I firmly believed both. He was a tough but very fair man.

You are right meth kills. That said, look at the latest designer drug, bath salts, K2...it kills too. Officials are slow to outlaw it and get it off the streets. As soon as they get one outlawed, there is a replacement.

When it comes to drugs, I think it's like a metal illness. If there wasn't meth there would be something else, then something else and so on.

It's sad.

George

Greg1959,

WOW! Tragically amazing difference in that guys looks in such a short time frame.

I saw a young couple in a grocery store last summer, probably 20ish...but looked 75ish! Rail thin like they escaped from a prison camp and the same open sores on their faces. Geez, I cannot believe what people will do for a buzz!

I have a cousin named Josh that just turned 21. He has had a job every day he's needed one since he was 14. Now he's a junior at UK (GO CATS!!!) study'n agronomy and hold'n down a job while he's up there. I guess not every one who named a kid Josh back then raised a worthless deadbeat.

Dave