Thanks for the advice, and my solution

jon f mn

Well-known Member
Thanks for all the responses yesterday, you really helped me make my desision. I wanted to explain a few things first.

A couple folks asked if I trusted him, and the answer is yes. If he had asked because he needed to get to school or work as John in la said, the answer would have been yes no question. I just feel that a vacation is a different deal. He is no more likely to do damage to it than my wife or I am.

The reason for this trip is he went to college for 2 years in Boise and he wants to go see his friends, and his girl friend who lives there. She has come here a couple times to visit him, so I supose that a trip out for him is not so out of line.

Finally to the "it's only a car" folks. Usually I would agree with you. But in this case there is a bit more to it. My wife and I have had a tough time financially ever since we've been married, and she has always been very poor. She had never owned a car newer than 15 years old. A couple years ago we were at the point where we had nothing to drive that was safe to go more than walking distance. I've been doing well enough that we could get a new car, so we did. We did one of those 2 year low milage leases with low payments and that worked ok, but we didn't like having to always watch where we went so we didn't run over on the miles. That ended now, so we decided to buy this time, but to buy the payments are quite a lot higher so our budget was going to be stretched. To get what she wanted we found a 2014 left over that with all the incentives brought the price to what we could afford. My point with this is that should it get wrecked, replacing it would be real tough, and would likely result in having to sacrifice some things as a new model of the same car is out of our price range. So there is some fear with loaning a car that is not just a car.

So any way here is what I decided, I started by explaining to him that I felt that if he couldn't afford a car he couldn't afford a vacation. I explained, as some said, that he should wait til he had a job and could pay his own way would be the resposible thing to do. But then I also showed him the Greyhound bus scedual and that he could ride the bus for less than gas. That made him excited. I also offered one other alternative, I said if he took his mom with he could take the car. She has only been on one trip since we got married 15 years ago and I thought it would be nice for them to spend some time together. Plus then I could kick in some money to cut his expenses and by sharing, my wife could get a vacation I couldn't take her on right now. I can give her enough money to pay for most of the trip if I don't have to take time off to go. He was completely understanding of my concerns and grateful for the advice. He said he would think about it and talk to his mom and let me know. By the way both their faces lit up when I suggested they go together I suspect that will be their choice. That would be great with me.
 
Sounds like a very well thought out and more than fair solution. Let us know which option he chooses just for the fun of it. I really like the take your mother on vacation idea, hope it works out for all of you
Chuck
 
So Three people are going to get a vacation? Well done sir!
If only more parents took the time to explain situations like this.
I can't tell you how much I appreciate your decision and for taking the time to post.

I hope everything works out for everyone.

Larry
 
Jon,

I admire your work ethic, and honestly you are teaching him things he will never forget in life. I didnt think I would see or read this, as so many do not teach kids, but Jon, you are on the right track.

Dan
 
Jon, I'm the guy who said a car is just a tin box on wheels but....funny enough we are in pretty much the same situation as you are and I'm sure if we ever get to where we can afford a new car I will probably feel pretty much like you do. My wife would love a new car.

Sounds like a good decision to me and I appreciate that you didn't go gnarly on the tin box comment. :)
 
Well it seems to be working out for the best. I just don't think I could do it because when someone uses my vehicle I can't rest and stay really stressed . I'm trying to be all about low stess. Sounds like you have good communication going .
 
Jon, I didn't read all the responses to your original post, but do agree you made a wise and fiar proposal to your Son and wife.
Just one more suggestion: Save the miles on your families new car, and rent a car for them to take on the trip. There are some pretty good deals out there, especially over a weekend/full week rates.

Best Wishes!
John
 
Sounds like a well thought out set of choices you have presented to him. It also sounds like your son feels the same way.
 
Most car rentals will not rent to someone under 25 or allow them to be listed a driver, if you wife decides to go that should make it possible too rent a car.

My wife and son took a 10 day trip by themselves after he graduated from college, that was six years ago and they still talk about it, great experience.

Rich
 
Sounds like you raised a fairly level headed son and you have some good communication between you. Not a lot of that left in the world. There is hope for the future....
 

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